Life and Leadership Lessons in Unexpected Places
“When you’re ready to give up, look for God in unexpected places.”
That was the topic I was given a few weeks ago when I spoke for our church’s youth group. And at the time, I was feeling quite the opposite. I was feeling completely defeated and ready to give up on a God-given dream. Ironic I know. Things weren’t panning out - I was further from my goal this year than I was at the same time last year. Opportunities felt harder to find than the letter Q during a round of the alphabet game on a long car ride. And as I dug into the message I was reminded that throughout both the Old and New Testament God rarely shows up in ways people prescribe or expect. That expecting or even demanding God to show up in a certain way and on our timetable are a fast pass to frustration. And my disappointment regarding my dream certainly stemmed from unmet expectations. I was trying to dictate the terms under which God showed up.
I have to wonder if part of the reason we don't see God at work is because we are placing expectations on Him to show up how and when we want.
That's what God reminded me of as I prepared that message. And of course, He showed up. Not how I would prescribe or on my timeline but as always right on time.
A working theory
I have this working theory, that part of the reason we are so easily offended in our current reality, is that it allows us to blame others for our feelings. If we are mad we must own that, but if we are offended it gets to be someone else's fault we are upset. I was under the impression that this was a modern problem when I stumbled upon the quotation above from Ralph Waldo Emerson. You know, the 19th century poet whose work you read in your high school English class? Not some modern motivational speaker or a prophet, but some dude who lived 150 years ago. So clearly this has been a challenge for people for some time. Simply put - we are not being attacked when someone disagrees with us. This is an important reminder if we are going to take ownership of our own emotions, increase understanding between people and cultivate growth in ourselves and our ideals.
What if it goes right?
I'm pretty late to the party but have you heard of motivational speaker Mel Robbins? She is a lawyer turned legal analyst turned podcaster/author/Ted Talk speaker. She is probably best known for her five second rule, which basically says if you want to accomplish anything you should start it within five seconds otherwise you will talk yourself out of it. I recently saw a reel where she addressed how to use this approach with fear. She contends that we give fear way too much playing time. So when we start to focus on all the things that could go wrong, we should count backwards from five and ask, “What if it all goes right?”
But really, what if it all goes right? Because in reality isn't it just as likely that something all goes right as it is to all go wrong? I know I know, neither scenario is likely and most of us actually would bet on everything going wrong before everything going right. Of course it's more likely whatever goal or plan or event we are working on will be a mixed bag, but what if even with mixed results it all works out?
When we focus on all that could go wrong it creates all sorts of hang ups from self-fulfilling prophecies to doubt. But worse yet, it allows fear to live in our head rent free and determine our next steps. We are the most anxious generation ever and, while it won't solve all our problems, taking our thoughts captive and replacing our negative thoughts with more positive ones certainly sounds like a good step towards healing.
In Conclusion
It always amazes me where lessons in life and leadership and living out our faith pop up. They're all around us if we look. And when we look, God is faithful to show up in unexpected ways with the lessons we need for whatever season we are in. May we all be quick learners of the lessons of this season!
